self service mailroom explosiveness

I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it with my own eyes. This was the battle of an All Star (Ron Hilson of the Rawlings All Star award) and an MVP (as in, Lindsey Naber-Garvey, NL MVP of 1974). And they were staring at each other in the mail room. Joann Miller had cleared out of the way faster than she has in a UFC bout (except for that Whiteside battle). The battle began by Naber hobbling over to the side, bending over struggling to get a box from the stash under the counter. It was obvious her knee was bothering her. Ron offered to help, squatting down to reach for a box. It was then that he realized, in a laser quick moment, that Lindsey was not wearing a normal knee brace... but one made of steel. This steel knee delivered a thud to the melon of Hilson and sent him to the ground. Lindsey then wrapped him gently in bubble wrap and began to attack her helpless prey. She extended an early 6-1 lead.

Suddenly, into the mailroom in a fury came Kathy "Just Try to Return That" Lutz, still fuming. Apparently she has been trying repeatedly to have her email address changed from it's current "clutz with a K at rawlings.com" to something more polite that generates less spam or at least less sales rep emails. This hasn't worked and she has no time for fighting anyway. She did have time to pop the bubble wrap on Hilson in a most painful manner, then pick up Naber and throw her onto the cart where she (and Hilson) were both wheeled out of the mailroom and into the hallway. Kathy did this in a quick and painless manner, very nonchelantly in fact. And she was off.

Hilson seized this as an opportunity to get bizzy, Paris style, as it's known to the Hilton team. He opened up a box and began tossing outfit after outfit at Naber - blowing her mind with the combination of outfit style and versatility. Naber did not know how to react. Should she recommend the Steak N Shake white top with the black bow tie, or should see where that top but put the Ten Pen bowling shirt on. She couldn't react to an outfit quick enough. Meanwhile Hilson kept on supplying outfit after outfit, fabric after fabric. Lindsey was confused by the style (of attack). Hilson narrowed the gap to 10-6 then closed it to 10-10 with an amazing, unpredictable Mr Cool-Flo shirt. wow.

Diana "La Ama de los Ocho Angulos" Estrada entered with a special international UFC delivery. No one was quite sure where this came from or how it was even possible, but she came with a message, in Spanish, although she translated it quickly to UFC with a double wheelbarrow pick up and toss, lifting Naber and Hilson away from the clothing display and to the ground. her point was made. quietly and quickly. but felt nonetheless.

Theat opening was all Naber needed. She one-legged ran over to Hilson (just like her personal trainer taught her) and used her good leg to balance while she bent her not so good leg to just the right angle and delivered a well placed and rapid paced series of mechanical thumps that resembled a foose-ball table attack to Hilson. He was a pawn in her game, unable to respond. Unable to move. unable to win.

Naber wins 21-10-2-2 over Hilson, Lutz, and Estrada and advances to meet Pam "Pann Pann" Klosterman on Monday 9/10.

Up next: a marketing versus graphics super fight:

#6 Jason "El Gigante" Voorhees versus #14 "Crystal" Seth Elrod

hit reply to vote (or email rawlingsufc@gmail.com). and don't play with fire. unless you are playing with that new rawlings basketball, en fuego. that's hot.