A Battle of Love

Oh, love is in the air. I've noticed this as I've watched J2 and Seth have worked patiently together on a special project going back and forth, picking out colors and details over the past several months. It's almost like they are planning a special event. I hope I'm invited...

Jason "El Gigante" Voorhees has been training for this matchup for awhile. In fact, for the past thirty days or so, he's been diligently taking a nice helping of Monavie. (for more info, go to monavie.com or swing by Voorhees' desk). The little purple liquid magic, as El Gigante calls it, had sculpted his muscles just enough that he could deliver the best bear hug you could ever receive. This tight, powerhug that started with a man-hug (the side type of hug) evolved into a full bore hug and with Seth resting his head contentedly on El Gigante's piped arms (El Gigante took a 4-0 lead for his Monavie training regimen, which slipped to 4.5-1.5 when Seth felt content rather than afraid.) Who needs to fight when you can rest, right? Wrong.

El Gigante turned the bear hug into a Full Nelson, uncomfortably taking down Elrod to the graphics canvas (a nice base for any artwork, by the way) in a crazy 9.5-4.5 lead. In the graphics area, they paused to see intern Dany Tirado's crazy new laptop-like drawing pad - which wowed those two as they gazed at the pretty technology, moving the score to 9 5/6 - 4 5/6 - 1/3 tally of Voorhees over Elrod over the Office of the Future.

In that moment, laying on the canvas, Seth went after J Two with his best weapon, and one that should have been expected... the man crush. This started with a look, then a second, double take kind of look. The kind that you hope the other person doesn't notice. (we all know this look - it's always noticed). He blushed. A shade of pink that we've all seen on Elrod. This man crush would revisit several times in the bout - as any powerful man crush does. For now, though, it narrowed the score to 9 5/6 - 7 5/6 - 1/3.

El Gigante has survived many a man crush before - as witnessed by many passersby, so he knows just how to break them. He acted completely disinterested in anything Seth had to say. This was very troubling for Elrod, who prides himself on being the center of a conversation. The more Seth tried to impress with flashy, coordinated outfits or witty sayings or even compliments, the more El Gigante ignored him. This silencer treatment pushed the score to 18 1/3 - 9 1/3 - 1/3.

El Gigante wins, remaining the top remaining seed in the once-proud Rio Regional.

He advances to meet the winner of Monday's first matchup:

#7 Barb "Pro Pain" Foerstel versus #15 Jan "Redbird Fury" Grundig

don't forget to vote for the second battle too... (Sturgis regional)

#1 Denny "Big Sexy" Whiteside versus #9 Brian "Big Thunder" Dorsey.

Email your vote to RawlingsUFC@gmail.com or hit reply.

And don't play with fire. Play kickball instead.