#4 Curtis Cruz “Control” vs. #13 Ron “100% Silky Cotton” Hilson
This was an interesting day for UFC fans. Not only did it pack a double punch of good old fashioned dragon slaying, but it allowed us to clearly see a difference in demographics. Which combatant would carry the early vote (those who replied to the hotmail email account)? And which carried the afternoon vote (those who hit reply and voted through Gmail?)
Well, one might think that time plays no factor in the life of Curtis Cruz “Control”. The man has shown a willingness to take to the fields at any and all hours of the day or night, earning pet nicknames from his peers such as Crack, SpeedBall, and Magic Pony (don’t ask). But how would he match up against the man recently named as a Rawlings All Star of the month? Perhaps we should best look at this as not just a battle of grit, but rather as a battle of belts. Black belts, that is. Curtis earned one for his years of Jiu-Jitso training, Ron built one into the Panda Express Uniform plus he can get one made up for you with a really quick turnaround. This one’s feeling too tough to call…
Now, for those of you who aren’t aware, there are some crazy things going on out in our tech center. You’ve got a renegade fight club, at least two employees (Becky Shaw and Jeremy O’Hara) playing hockey before they get married, there’s a robot that hits things all day and a temp that is paid to feed it. Plus Biju Mathew has a broken elbow. Curtis took an early edge of 3-0 simply by the reputation that his home dojo brought into this battle.
But then we get to Hilson. Working from a cubicle that is basically an island surrounded by interns gets him going early each day. Then he has to deal with outfitting every Best Buy computer technician to a precise fit. (and if you haven’t seen those kids, let’s just say that they’re not a one-size-fits-all lot). Hilson’s refusal to back down puts us at a 3-3 tie.
They met in the apparel war room (fittingly named by Hilson one afternoon as he ripped Matt Bensing’s planning calendar off his wall and tore it into little tiny pieces. Curtis attacked first, coming in with a leg sweep that, while jittery was effective in taking down the lanky Hilson, knocking over a rack of Buffalo Wild Wings jerseys in the process and forcing Ron to retaliate. He did so visually, by outfitting himself in the Inferno (Style IF-5 for those of you scoring at home). This polo from Hilton’s Speed Zone line definitely lets you see in an instant that the wearer of the shirt means business. So while the morning turnout was a bit low, it was equal as these two warriors locked in a 6-6 draw.
The afternoon saw a series of lead changes, and outfit changes. For every attack that Curtis delivered, Ron had a response. Cruz downed a Jolt Cola (up 9-6) and hit Hilson with a series of questions (now up 12-8) hurled at a pace that many an on-looker stood in awe (make that 13-8). Hilson slowed things down a bit (13-10) putting on a Pit Crew pullover (13-12 – style H42-3) as he went to work on the midsection of Cruz. The final raspberry he delivered pulled Hilson ahead 17-12. Cruz went for one final caffeine run, slamming a Dew (17-14), breaking the can on his head (17-16 Hilson, with a -1 to Adam Shupe for his can crusher being un-used). But it wouldn’t be enough. Hilson just had too many outfits to change into, delivering a victory and a new nickname. Ron “
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