Blinded by the Light?

Just how would Wendy "Nasty Newlywed" Mathis withstand the Blinding White Light known to the rest of us as Jeff "White Walls" France?

Everyone knows that France is not a morning person. As Jeff pulled into the Rawlings Group parking lot, he had no idea what was about to happen. He wheeled into his trusty parking space, got out of his car, and turned to walk into the building. He didn't even think to look up in the trees along the edge of the lot. There, seated in some branches high amongst the trees, Mathis sat waiting -- just like she and Tomaszewski had drawn it up during one of their smoke-break training sessions. She allowed Jeff's flowing locks to turn away from her and then pounced, delivering a flying elbow drop into the small of France's back and sending him into a Francic stuppor. As he tried to get his bearings, Mathis grabbed him by his golden locks and pulled him into the building, where she high-fived the Verizon security guards as she staked to an early 4-0 lead.

But once inside the building, France got to work. He bent over, polished up his kicks, and in three blinding flashes of pure white light delivered three of the swiftest windmill kicks one could ever imagine - narrowing the gap to 4-3. This explosion, in fact was a shout back to the olden days, to a form of communication much like those used by lighthouses at sea - flashes of light that send messages to ships. The message here was clear: PAIN was on the way.

And Mathis received that message.

The Schizo-Frantic France began to spin as he delivered lightning bolt after lightning bolt of pure joy, inflicting his will as he staked to a 6-5 advantage....

Unfortunately though, the noise was just too much for his neighbor (and tomorrow's fighter) Denny "Big Sexy" Whiteside to take. Whiteside wheeled back in his office chair, leaped into the air and extended his legs mid-air into a perfect split kick - knocking out both combatants and making his presence felt. He earned his two quick points and left the scene.

Both combatants separated and prepared for their big move. This was the time of the fight where it would turn one way or the other. Mathis dug into her purse for the ultimate weapon. Meanwhile, France tightened his shoelaces. It was time.

Jeff pulled his leg back and began to swing. But, just as his powerful K-Swiss plunged forward, Mathis pulled out her makeup compac, or as we know it in the UFC, the "France Slayer." She skillfully adjusted the mirror and suddenly France caught his own eyes with a shoeful of white lightning. The light of his own shoes was scorching hot. He plunged backwards in a mix of confusion and pain as he rubbed his eyes and fell to the graphics turf. Mathis then jumped into the air, leaped onto a table, flipped, and delivered a crushing blow known in the UFC world as "Total Elimination," which was a combination of a spinning leg sweep to the back of his legs followed by a quick spinning heel-kick, France could not react quick enough, and he staggered into a 16-5 deficit.

Suddenly, however, France reached for his computer and cranked up his iTunes with a bit of rock and roll. The harsh sounds of music involving guitars and drums took Mathis aback. What was that music? She lost her balance and stumbled, just in time to be greeted by a series of hair whips... the gap narrowed to 16-10. And then France got the feet going....

But his late run would not be enough. Mathis emerges as the victor, 16-14-2 over France (and Whiteside). She will fight the winner of our next matchup in the Rawlings UFC title game this Thursday! Here's the next Final 4 matchup:

Denny "Big Sexy" Whiteside versus Travis "Monster Truck" Gessley.