France versus France

Today was, without a doubt, the most heated, bloody confrontation ever seen in a Rawlings UFC matchup. It was an epic battle. One for the ages. And one that just had the power to drive a certain Jeff France CRAZY.

But today was not the first time these two men, Jeff "Man of the Blinding Light" France and Jeff "Pure Darkness" France had battled. The two have, in fact, been tangling on and off for the past few decades. Before we get into today's matchup, let's take the time to go back and review some of the most memorable France clashes.

June 1974. A young, svelt Jeff France stared into his bathroom mirror. Wondering what would happen if he'd let those golden locks of his extend just beyond the bottom of his painter's cap. It was in that moment that the France mullet was born. But it did not grow to that level instantly. There were battles. Moments where Jeff wanted to have the clean cut image instilled in him from his youth. France of the dark side was becoming more prominent, as he won this matchup and held his reign of terror for several years...

March 1988. Spring was coming, and Jeff could just feel it. He pranced outside in the meadow, actually catching himself skip as he hummed to himself. What was happening to him? He scurried inside and clad himself in pearly whites, from head to toe. He trimmed his hair, donned some shades, and went back to enjoy the sunshine. The world was good, and the man we call France was glimmering. It was a time of Free Love for France of the Light.

January 2005. France unveiled the brightest white shoes to hit the Rawlings Group yet.

June 2006. France of the Dark began to emerge, hastened out thanks to some difficulties in the apparel catalog. The man in black resurfaced, lighting was removed from his office, and those who passed closely by his office swear they hear howling when they come near late in the day.

September 22, 2006. The ultimate test:

France arrived early today. (score one point for the light), but donned head to toe in black (make that 1-1). He poured some coffee and cranked up some Icelandic music on his stereo and entered the state known to some as the France Trance. The darkness beckoned. 2-1 dark.

But then the sounds of gleeful playing nearby in his graphics playpen sent warm energy through France. He began to feel something slowly move up his face. What was that? A smile? why, Yes it was. The light began to take over the room. France stood up and began to slowly groove in his office. First his hips moved, then he started to shift in his Snow white K Swiss specials. Lightness abounded 5-2 France.

But then, the music stopped. Get to work he said. What are you doing? You need to finish this. Petco didn't like that. Where's my pizza? Why won't you hold me? the questions started coming in in every direction and the darkness began to take over our once light-hearted hero. 5-5. France did not see the assassin drop his hammer-like fists into his side three times before leaving as quietly as he arrived.

And then Andy "Tower of Power" Pawlowski stopped by. How is France supposed to get any work done with all of these interruptions? Pawlowski dropped off a stack of incomplete art requests and took off for what is best determined to be a vacation. Those art requests can really hurt...

Alone again, France began to beat himself up. Even more so. But this time it was his feet that did the talking. He glanced down and saw radiant light eminating from his shoes. And he couldn't contain himself. I AM JEFF FRANCE. He thought. No he yelled. And then he laughed. The light was winning.... at least for now.

France of the light wins 8-5-3-1 over the darkness and those other people.

France is the champion of the Looking Pretty Region. Up next for him is the Stare at Numbers champ, Wendy Mathis...

And, for those of you who want to see how far we've come, here's the updated bracket.

Up next Monday:

Championship of the Product Kings Region: Ron "Foot of Fury" Kappauff versus Travis "British Bulldog" Gessley

email your vote to RawlingsUFC@hotmail.com